Macy's Day Parade

Goodbye

2011-07-28T16:51:00.001+08:00

Not coming back here anymore.

Just An Undiscovered Soul

2011-05-14T16:09:00.003+08:00

It's been exactly a month since school started. This week of school was horrible. I slept for about 10 hours tops, from Monday to Friday. By the time it was Thursday, I can barely stand straight up, and walk in a straight line.

Had a couple of awesome moments this week though, so I shall not complain. The only bummer is that this is only fucking week 4 of school. I can't even bear to imagine how the rest of the sem would be like. Oh, and this ought to be the easier sem out of the 2.1 and 2.2, so I can't even imagine how 2.1 would be like next sem.

Things have been pretty confusing with someone in my life now. I don't really know how to read that person. I can safely say even reading someone's poker hand is way easier than this. Way, way easier. Things just don't add up. They don't make sense to me.

Apart this little rant, everything else in my life is going great. I don't even know where this post is going anymore.

War Machine

2011-04-29T20:31:00.003+08:00

"You've been such a good friend to me. I'm pretty fond of you. I love being with you, talking with you, spending time with you. In all this, you're so dear to me, and I'm starting to realize that somewhere along the way, I think I fell in love with you"

Second week of school is over. It's been pretty stale and uneventful, apart from Web D, where ahsan offered me a pretty damn fucking awesome chance. I don't know if it's the fact that I got offered the chance, or the fact that it's a bigger opportunity than what I've ever gotten. Ok there's the small of chance of me designing the 988online website, but that's another story.

Other than the Web D news, nothing else is actually that interesting. Oh, 4 hour breaks on Thursdays are still legendary to me. Who has 4 hour breaks honestly. The most that I've heard of was something like 3 hours tops? 4 hours. Fucking killer.

Anyways looking forward to poker tmr night and the long weekend ahead! It's gonna be awesome I hope! =)

Ciao pao.

Every Rose Has Its Thorns

2011-04-28T10:41:00.000+08:00

So the last time I wrote anything here, I was in a Web Design Applications lecture (where I did not pay any attention btw), and now I'm in the Web Design Applications tutorial.

We are doing html coding, writing html codes from scratch. I have to say that this is my first time writing a html code right from scratch, and it's actually fun. It's amazing actually. Whoever who came up with the language of HTML and compile them into this form today; they're amazing.

A little bit of geek talk here, but writing in HTML is way, way cleaner than using a WYSIWYG editor. You do not create unwanted tags and codes, and you can clean it up much quicker.

I hate Thursdays though. I have to wake up early in the morning for an 8am class, only to have a 4 hours break before my last class at 3pm. It's kind of like, wtf? I'm gonna work on my assignments later, and settle some radio shit before Comiss.

Wednesdays are fast becoming my favourite days of the school week.

!@#$%^&*()

Maroon 5.

2011-04-25T15:43:00.001+08:00

I'm sitting in Web D lecture now. First week of school ended with a long weekend for Good Friday last week. Basically spent the weekend like the holiday, just bumping around and shit like that. Watched 2 good movies over the weekend; Memento and Se7en.

The ending of both film really blew my mind away. Literally. I wonder why such movies are not made anymore. Such beautiful screenplay and delivery.

I don't like Web D. That's a true statement. Just because I'm decent at something doesn't mean I like. It's just that I have an easier time with it. There are a lot of tweets on twitter about the Web D lecture at the moment. I also I want to write a couple of things, but I can't

I want to write:

I don't really give a fuck about Web D.
I don't like this.
I think I'm gonna have a hard time this sem.
I'm fucked.

But I can't. Unlike some of my friends, although Im fine if there are shit said against me, but I don't want to cause anymore shit. If I tweet something like that, I'm just gonna be misunderstood easily. I guess. it's a scary scary place here where I am now.

I'm not exactly listening to ahsan now. He's just going on about HTML and stuff like that. Oh the screen just flashed 'It's not scary at all'.

OO he just flashed Hello World! A geek term. Anyways, gonna go catch Maroon 5 live later. Hope it's great!

Update: Alrights I just got back from the show. It was decent to me at best. Just not that huge of a fan. Though it's awesome that they played The Sun, one of my favourite songs from them, which to me is extremely underrated.

Here I Go Again On My Own #thatawkwardmoment

2011-04-19T21:10:00.008+08:00

Yup kiddos. School started yesterday. I don't know if I'm happy about that. It's kind of a mix feeling actually. I'm finally back in the field, getting to work and leading a more normal life, instead of watching sitcoms in my room everyday. To be honest it's not that bad, but it kind of suck the life out of you until you're a vegetable. (Don't worry. It's not as bad as it sounds. Seriously.)

Been having lectures for the past 2 days. I don't dread the sem that much anymore, as most of the lectures are pretty bearable. That would mean that the Monday and Tuesday of every week wouldn't suck that much. Tutorials for another 2 more days and it's the 1st weekend.

Note: If you didn't know, the first weekend of any school term is always the most sacred. It's always the last weekend where you can actually feel holiday-ee.

Enjoy yourself as much as you can, because the coming weeks would be well, hell.

In life, we always have those awkward moments, situations that you rather not be in it. There are those where a girl walks in on you while you're shitting, or you tell a joke and nobody laughs except for yourself, or you laughed so hard while telling a joke that nobody knew what you were talking about.

Yes, that's right. I'm talking about #thatawkwardmoment.

Not many of these scenarios actually happen all that often. Except for one. I'm pretty sure that this particular kind of moments happened to everyone before.

Imagine, you're out with some of your friends. You are walking to this nice cafe in just a t-shirt and some jeans. You're not exactly looking the best, but who cares, you're out with your close buddies. No one really minds. It's not like you're on a date.

Suddenly, this handsome man appears in the distance. Oh there he goes, looking pretty good. Wow. The closer he comes, the more you find him familiar. Suddenly, something in your mind snaps. 'THAT'S JOHNNY FROM YOUR PRIMARY SCHOOL CLASS!'

All of a sudden, you panic. You don't know how good or bad you look. (Not that you're gay, but looking so sloppy after so many years. It just doesn't flow at all.) Your old friend Johnny looks really good himself. Then a couple of questions pops into your mind.

"Does he recognise me?" "Should I say hi?" "What if he doesn't recognise me and I'll look like an idiot." "Did he see me?" "Should I just pretend I didn't?"

And all the while you avoid eye contact with him. By the time you really make up your mind, he's walked past you, and you can only pray he did not see you, so that at the next class gathering, there wouldn't be that awkward question of "Hey I saw you the other day. I waved to you but you didn't wave back!" You're gonna lie through your teeth and say, "Oh sorry must have missed you", when you clearly didn't (Liar liar pants on fire)

Let's tweak this scenario a little. Well tweak it a lot. You are in the school canteen and you see your (use-to-be-really-close-but-now-you're-just-acquaintances) friend. At that very moment, you know the two of you made eye contact. In your own mind, you're not sure if your relationship actually permits you to say hi anymore, and you choose to simply look away, not even bothering to acknowledge his or her existence.

#thatawkwardmoment when you're not sure if you should say hi to someone you know.

Life is sad.

Baby Can't Drive

2011-04-15T01:16:00.003+08:00

My most vivid memories of this song are the Monday mornings of the first semester when I would be heading for my IS class at block 72. I remember vividly, that I would be blasting this song on my iPod while walking into the school to kickstart my day, or rather the entire week.

I used to look forward to my monday classes. As kiddy as it sounds, I looked forward to meeting one of my best friends, who was in the same class as me. His sleepy and unkempt look seemed really appealing compared to the start of another boring week in school. School felt so different back then. It was actually enjoyable.

Today is Marcus's birthday. He's pretty much one of my buddies in school right now. Amazing how things can turn out sometimes. We used to not talk to each other in school as both of us gave a pretty unfriendly vibe to each other. I shall save you the details, but we went to visit Kelvin who was sick, met up with Jia Han Alex and Mark for dinner, and went prawning!

Pretty fun, but I doubt I'll want to prawn again unless anyone wants to.

There's a side of me that I don't want to acknowledge, but yet I know of it's existence. I know I'm a narcissist, or at least a part of me is one. Over the year, I've also grown to be extremely crude, negative and extremely quick to put people down,. It's so bad to the point where I do it subconsciously and telling myself its ok to do it. It's fucking not. I feel fucking fake at times. So fake that I fucking hate it.

I know I'm not a perfect person, but I scare myself.

I scare me.

Here we go again

2011-04-13T20:33:00.002+08:00

School's around the corner, in a couple of days. I used to dread school really badly. I guess I still do, but not as much as before.

I cannot figure out if it's because school's kind of fun, or because I'm doing fine in terms of results.

It's definitely better than before though, considering the fact that used to score 44 points for my L1R5? Yeah definitely better.

Many things changed over the course of a few months. Had a really good talk with Nat earlier, and we all miss the simplicity of our days back in VS. Nothing to even worry about. As he said, and I quote "Even when we quarrel, it doesn't even last. We are all still friends."

When I think about it, I'm thankful for all the people that entered my life thus far. I feel like I don't spend enough time hanging around, helping, or even speaking to some friends that were always there for me, but I love my friends.

As fucking corny or cliche as it may sound, I'm looking forward to the new challenges this upcoming semester may bring me. It's not gonna be a walk in the part for me, or for anyone for that matter, though those of us who are in Year 2 are already used to the lifestyle of poly.

A couple more days to my 16 weeks of hell.

Amen to that.

#thatawkwardmoment

2011-04-11T01:12:00.005+08:00

Your facebook profile is one of my top sites.

....well this is awkward.

The Usual Suspects

2011-04-08T23:43:00.004+08:00

"The greatest trick the devil ever pulled was convincing the world he didn't exist."

Awesome, awesome show. It's not so much of a unexpected twist and turn that made the whole film great. It's the way the film was delivered with the editing, the mood, and everything. It just felt right, great.

Been slacking around, lazing around, getting abit of work done here and there. Watched Season 1 to 6 of Two and a Half Men. On Season 7 now, but it feels really dry now.

Just a couple of days before school starts. Honestly I'm not looking forward to Year 2 at all. My classmates looks pretty alright for now, so no complaints there. Hope it goes well.

Oh Alex, Marcus and Mark came over to my place yesterday for a good game of poker, movies, chips and do-any-nonsense session. It's good to hang out with the guys from school before school starts. Really really missed Kelvin over the holidays. Thankfully it's only a month plus worth of holidays, if not I'll miss him until I cry.

Good days bro, if you're reading this.

"And he's gone."

Don't Love You No More

2011-04-04T19:27:00.011+08:00

The first song I put on my first blog. So amateurish and so young at the time. My first blogger URL was http://lookin-for-myself.blogspot.com/

In fact, there was a joke on my blog URLs

from lookin-for-myself
to iambeno (after I found myself)

Funny eh? (adds canned laughter)

Circuit driving today, wasn't so good. I don't know if it's me being tired, or simply because I'm nervous about my driving test tomorrow. I kind of hate driving in the circuit to be honest. Fucking narrow roads at pathetically slow speed.

Today, I couldn't focus when my instructor was telling me to move/brake/turn here there. I was very caught up with my own mind. Sometimes I can drive without thinking on the main road, but not the circuit. I have to be extra fucking careful in the circuit, which is a kind of a bummer, as I have to take note of my feet too, unlike the main road.

That being said, it could be due to the lack of sleep. As I might have mentioned on twitter before (if you don't follow me and you want to, scroll down, and the link's on the right), I'm nocturnal now, especially after that poker game on Saturday night. I pretty much slept at 4pm on Sun and woke up at 1am on Monday morning. I've been awake ever since. My lesson was at 3pm earlier, so I was pretty damn tired and sleepy. By the way, it's Monday right now (at the point of writing this), so I hope that explains.

I aim to sleep at 11pm later to get plenty of rest for my big day tomorrow.

Urgh. Life's a drag.

Unsound.

2011-04-03T09:08:00.003+08:00

Everyone's on edge, including me. Long holiday kills.

Win some and lose some

2011-04-01T23:37:00.003+08:00

I kinda sorta saw dalxy's blog, and that made me feel like writing something here again. I used to use twitter to really just splash what I wanna say, but apparently that's not the way to go.

It's really been about 6 months since I even wrote anything substantial here. Life's been treating me decent. A whole shitload of stuff happened. It's a little hard to comprehend, but fuck it life goes on.

I've lost friends along the course of the sem, someway somehow. I made a lot of new friends though. Kelvin, jiahan, dalxy, marcus and a shitload of other people. I'm thankful for all of my friends, honestly.

My results are decent, not excellent I guess. There's only about 2 weeks plus of holidays left, so I should do my best to enjoy the rest of the hols, before hell starts in Year 2 again. Speaking of which, I sort of remember the time when school first started. I was fresh out of VS, not exactly sure what to expect for poly, and after a year of poly, I hardened up as a person. I believe all of us in poly did.

Meeting the lads for poker tomorrow night. Looking forward!

Changes

2010-12-25T17:14:00.002+08:00

Honestly, my english sucks for someone in Mass Comm. I'm always flattered when anyone actually says I write well. Perhaps I can write well with simple english, but I'm never, and I emphasize, I'm never a user of big, chim words.

I'm just a regular guy who enjoys rock n' roll music, who studies in a course where people are stereotyped to be strong in english. Perhaps I'm the good among the bad, and the bad among the good, if you get what I mean.

I was having moment of nostalgia, as I sat in Macs with some of my close friends early in the morning on Friday. We were sharing about our life, then it came to all of us that we've been through a lot together. It never did seem to matter what we did. We just spent time hanging out together a lot. We have a large group of friends whom still met up after a long time. It's not usually for anything special. We just call each other out to hang out. It's a great feeling to know you have friends as such.

We are all afraid of changes, but yet we are accustomed to changes. Though I must, I hate changing after setting myself in tone for a certain lifestyle. It's a plain weird feeling, to leave a place, knowing that you would never come back in the same manner again.

Perhaps, that's why we hate changes

Quiet

2010-11-29T17:06:00.000+08:00

Beno's quiet only because there's nothing noteworthy to talk about at all.

Ok. I thankful for the new friend's I've found in life. That's all.

Bye.

A bittersweet sensation

2010-10-29T19:27:00.002+08:00

It's been what, 2 weeks since I came back from Wuhan.

The memories of those days are starting to fade, as I succumb back to what is called the 'Singapore Student Life', which surprise surprise, consists of nothing but homework, deadlines and other crap.

Friends? Yeah, I have friends in school. Mostly schoolmates though, where we can chat and have fun, but there's nothing much really too common other than that. I guess I have, 3, or 4 friends in school. No offense to anyone. It' just me I guess.

I can't wait for the A's to be over, then my friends will return.

Five Sweat

2010-10-18T21:00:00.003+08:00

In every class in every school, there is the scene kid, the rocker kid, the joker, the quiet ones, the mugger ones, and the crazy ones.

I wonder which one I fall under.

I'm back from my trip to Wuhan. I guess I'll never blog about it, because it's just too much to write that I'm lazy. Know that you're missed while I was there. If you want, I can let you read my trip journal though.

=) See you on the other side.

Knocking on Heaven's Door

2010-09-18T02:01:00.002+08:00

The song that's playing on our RMB100 speakers now.

Such a simple song with such simple meaning, yet it's so powerful.

The first week of our trip in China is almost over. It feels really, unreal, in a way. I've never been away all alone overseas with only my friends. I would not say I'm missing home a lot, but there's the sense of security that I can't feel over here.

The sense of familiarity, the sense of being in control, is lacking over here. I guess nothing's new here anymore. It's time I settled down properly, and embrace the rest of the trip.

Wuhan

2010-09-18T01:51:00.001+08:00

Honestly, ask me to blog about my trip, I also don't know what can I write.

The weather's fine. The prices are good. The food is decent.

I'm great.

Not homesick, yet.

Day 3 in Wuhan

2010-09-14T22:17:00.002+08:00

Life in WuHan has been good. Our room are like fucking hotel rooms, with everything we need, and everything more.

I'll write more when I got the time. =)

Pictures for now

This is my room

Fucking TV got HBO

My table and bed

Toilet

Got heater too. Nice showers.

My roommate Randall =)

Vater: Session Wood

2010-09-08T19:21:00.002+08:00

I'm fortunate to have found these in my 2nd pair of drumsticks.
Someone please give me a lifetime supply of these.

Coconut Battery

2010-09-08T09:22:00.001+08:00

This is a good sign. I like.
2 years and still left with 80% charge.

4 days to Pandaland

2010-09-07T13:04:00.002+08:00

I'll be on my way to China in about 120 hours from now.
Suddenly it's turning into a scary thought, but I guess I'll do fine. I hope I will.

4 days of roadshow at Comex is over. It's always tough for roadshows, especially for promoters. I was with Greenlight selling Macs. Though the pay was honestly not too good, the vibe of the whole working environment was really good.

No jumpers, nice bosses, good workers welfare. You can't ask for more (more pay would be good though)

I felt like I was back with the iShop people where it felt family. Perhaps selling Apple products brings people in like this.

I'm knocking off in 10 minutes. Oh. Did I mention I had a case of food poisoning yesterday? I felt like dying. Fortunately I'm feeling much better today to come to work. Tomorrow will be my last day with CNPL, then I'm officially back to school as a full time student once again.

Hello China.

Epic

2010-09-01T12:27:00.003+08:00

Working now. This morning was fucking epic. I woke up and realised it was 9am. Epic part, I start work at 8.30. Rushed like mad, but reached office only at 9.45. Came in slowly and quietly and hoped my boss didn't notice how late I am.

Honestly I'm really lucky. I don't know if he simply don't care about me being late or early (since I'm working by project based), or he didn't notice. Either way, I'm glad.

Went back to VS yesterday, since it was Teacher's Day celebrations. Met my favourite Math teacher Mr Z! Had a long chat with him. It's Leroy's birthday today, so we had a cake for him yesterday.

Met various other teachers too, like Miss Choo, Mrs Foo, Miss Leow, and of course, my favourite classmates from 4E'09. It's times like those when I truly miss my times in VS, yet I know I have to move on. We are all growing up too fast.

I gotta face the world too.

I would suppose I'm working at the roadshow tomorrow, selling Apple stuff, but the person from Meek have not gotten back to us regarding ANY details, so things look bleak for now. Really really bad organisation skills. I hate this.

The Trouble with Music

2010-08-30T13:41:00.010+08:00

I wrote this letter and sent it out. Let's see what would happen.

--------------------------------------

First, let’s define what is music. As dictionary.com defines it, it is ‘an art of sound in time that expresses ideas and emotions in significant forms through the elements of rhythm, melody, harmony, and color.‘

Before talking about the reality, let’s put our eyes back say, 20 years in the United States. Music was something that was done out of passion, love, and respect for the art. Even when labels sign on some of these musicians, they still had control over their music, their image. Let’s not take anyone too exotic. Let’s talk about Guns ‘N Roses. They started playing small shows, in clubs and all. Eventually when they were signed to a label called Geffen Records, they still retained their sound and continued doing what they did before being signed.

At that time, music did not lie. What they played was music written by them. It represented the their energy and passion, their definition to music. It was the same for most other musician then. Every musician were writing their own passion, their love. The listeners agreed to the music that was coming from the bands. If they don’t agree, they don’t listen to them. But there was respect. Respect between the audience and the bands, the respect between the bands and the labels, and most importantly, respect between the labels and the audience.Labels were respectful of the audience’s ears. They were respectful of the art, which we all call music.
Where did that respect go?

Let’s look at 20 years later, today. Music is as popular and as relevant today as it was 20 years ago. That fact remains unchanged. What has changed, is the kind of music is that coming out from the new generation artist. I’m not talking about 80’s, 90’s musicians, such as Green Day, Metallica, U2, releasing new albums. I’m talking about mainstream artists such as Akon, Justin Biber, Sean Kingston.

On the surface level, there is nothing really wrong with what they are doing. They make music. People buy them. What is so wrong, is what goes on behind. Some of these musicians are pretty much ‘products’ fabricated by some of these labels, who are there out to earn money. They force their artist under their wing to carry a certain image, to appeal to a group of audience, for the money factor. When people like these artists, people will buy their CDs, people will buy their merchandise, people will go to their concert. Labels earn the money.

It’s not the artist’s fault. I would not blame it entirely on the labels too. It’s not totally audience or media’s fault too. Everyone is to be blamed.

Let’s break it down in a logical way. Labels mean business. They want to earn money. There’s nothing wrong with earning money, except that it never stops. To make the money pot even shinier, the labels fabricate these artists, and their sound, to appeal to the general audience. To them, it does not matter if there is any meaning to the music released. Even if they repeat a line over and over again in a song, it does not matter if it earns them money.

Media influences people. Whenever any artists have any gossips, their image gets affect, and so will the sales of their cds/merchandises. Therefore, in order to keep their money pot nice and shiny, labels have no choice but to keep up with the public’s expectations on their artists. In order to do that, they are extremely careful with what their artist can, or cannot do.

Finally, it’s the people’s fault to be so easily swayed by the media. Once a gossip comes out, people start judging, and an artist can be affected by one simple gossip, or so-called hot news.

It’s a cruel circle between the media, labels and the people. So cruel that labels are capable of anything just to earn money. In this process trying to earn money, trying to keep the media off their backs, trying to appeal to audience, something beautiful was forgotten. Music.

What used to be a beautiful art is now simply a tool to make money. I’m not saying that there are no good musicians and artists now. Artists such as Lily Allen, Rob Thomas, Marilyn Manson and Linkin Park; they are still true to what they write. But how many artist can be like them, getting their music heard and still have control over what they write.

Let’s push the scope back to Singapore. In Singapore, there are no lack of good bands, good musicians. What they lack are supportive labels who are able to trust and put faith these bands, labels who wants something more than simply money. Some good example of musicians who are capable of making it with enough support would be bands such as Astroninja, The Great Spy Experiments. Astroninja even gathered their own fanbase all the way to the States, because they have great music, without even being signed to any labels. Just as a YouTube artist, David Choi has said, he would not consider getting signed to a major label, because there is a lack of control.

There are no issues with staying indie, staying independent, except that, chances are these musicians, artists are not going to be heard. Musicians, who aspire to be heard, would not want to be signed due to the lack of control.

Take a good listen to the music that’s on your iTunes now. They might sound catchy or funky, but is it really music that you relate to? Is it really music that expresses ideas or emotions, or is it music that makes labels money and nothing else. Personally I hold a firm belief that music is the heart and soul of a person, and it should not be fabricated to earn money.

I urge everyone to start supporting artists who are really good at what they do, but not getting the deserved attention at the same time. 20 years down the road, when we ponder about the standard of music that ‘musicians’ are bringing to you, do not be surprised when you realize it’s our own fault all along.

Bored

2010-08-29T13:52:00.000+08:00

People were really bored on 22ng Aug.

C.H.I.N.A.

2010-08-29T13:48:00.000+08:00

Fuck. I gotta start packing for China. *panicks*

*dies*

I believe in a thing called love

2010-08-28T20:31:00.003+08:00

I really do.

But the inspiration for this title came from the song though that I'm listening to now though.

The week's been pretty mundane thus far. Been working, teaching tuition, and just having a day to myself at home. I miss playing music. I want to jam again. Like, really really badly. I need to play some drums. I think I really miss that from my life.

I realised I've not blogged about this yet. My 'decorate-your-macbook' movement a few weeks back. I got bored of the white flap with only an apple logo, so I went ahead and did this.

Listening to 'For the love of god' by Steve Vai. Pure work of art. It's like a beautiful guitar singing a song full of emotions.

My project with CNPL would be coming to an end really soon. I'm glad that I managed to pull it off eventually. Oh, I'm also working at the roadshow in the coming week, so yeah, look for me if you need any apple stuff yeah? (y)

Room Revamp

2010-08-22T21:50:00.003+08:00

My dad was willing to fork out the money.
We came to common conclusion on what to do.
My brother didn't want, because he likes his spot.

Fuck.

I hate the way the room is.
I fucking hate it. No room to do fucking shit.
That stupid fucking structure for the bed.

Fuck.

He likes his spot because his bed is next to our working table.
He can lie down on his bed to watch movie on his screen.
He got the good spot, so he doesn't want to change

Fuck.

Fucking ten years already.
Can't you just fucking compromise a little.
And let me have a more comfy room.

Fuck.

Work and Geraldine

2010-08-21T17:24:00.002+08:00

Been working at CNPL, as I've said before.

So yesterday was my work day (Friday). A busy morning, all the way till 3, then nothing to do till it's time to knock off.

Met Geraldine to play pool, and chatted about a lot of things. Haha. Interesting stories and interesting life.

Oh. Ran into Chloe and Ben at Kovan too. Hung out with them for a while before Geraldine came.

Phones

2010-08-21T17:17:00.002+08:00

One thing's for sure. I swear I'll never get another Window's Mobile phone.

It's annoying. I want a phone that doesn't lag when I need it to work. I need a phone that does not die on me easily. I want a phone, that works.

I guess my next phone would be either an iPhone or BB. Thing is, BB is really exp, and iPhone is, well, damn common.

I like the touch keypad for iPhone though. The QWERTY for BB is abit small for my liking. But in any case, I gotta stick with my X1 for another year, so yeah.

This sucks =(

And so it goes.

2010-08-20T02:20:00.002+08:00

In times like these
In times like those
What will be will be
And so it goes
And it always goes on and on...
On and on it goes

Yeah. So it goes.

There are moments I feel like I can own the world.
Others, I feel like an idiot

Yknow I realise I don't really blame you. I was over it a long time ago. Over, a long long time ago. I don't talk to you because, I don't know why.

Too young, too proud, to understand
-DongTZ

How true.

What will be will be
And so it goes
And it always goes on and on...
On and on it goes

And there it goes.

David Choi

2010-08-19T00:48:00.003+08:00

That's me on the left, and David Choi on the right. =)

Okay fine. The happiness I had from seeing him yesterday is over. He really is humble and really shy. He looked so awkward and shy; quite the funny moment.

But what's even more awesome than David yesterday, was the company I had at Timbre. Randall, Geraldine, Amanda, and Cassandra (G's friend).

Oh. Geraldine was really happy that she brushed shoulders with David. According to her, can **** one. =)

So this guy beside me, the guy in white. Yeah he's Randall, and sad to say, one of my closer friends in NP. He's awesome. Don't judge him. He might look like a dick, but he's awesome. =)

Okay he can be an ass sometimes. I'll give him that.

The Static Age

2010-08-16T02:39:00.002+08:00

Fuck me and my typos. Damn annoying.

Listening to this song right now. Green Day - The Static Age

Can you hear the sound of the static noise?
Blasting out in stereo
Cater to the class and the paranoid
Music to my nervous system
Advertising love and religion
Murder on the airwaves
Slogans on the brink of corruption
Vision of blasphemy, war and peace
Screaming at you

I can't see a thing in the video
I can't hear a sound on the radio
In stereo in the static age

Billboard on the rise in the dawn's landscape
Working your insanity
Tragic a'la madness and concrete
Coca-Cola execution
Conscience on a cross and
Your hearts in a vice
Squeezing out your state of mind
Are what you own that you cannot buy
What a fucking tragedy, strategy
Screaming at you.

I can't see a thing in the video
I can't hear a sound on the radio
In stereo in the static age

I can't see a thing in the video
I can't hear a sound on the radio
In stereo in the static age

Hey hey, it's the static age
This is how the west was won
Hey hey, it's the static age millennium

All I want to know
Is a god-damned thing
Not what's in the medicine
All I want to do is
I want to breathe
Batteries are not included
What's the latest way that a man can die
Screaming hallelujah?
Singing out "the dawn's early light"
The silence of the rotten, forgotten
Screaming at you.

I can't see a thing in the video
I can't hear a sound on the radio
In stereo in the static age

I can't see a thing in the video
I can't hear a sound on the radio
In stereo in the static age

I can't see a thing in the video
I can't hear a sound on the radio
In stereo in the static age

I can't see a thing in the video
I can't hear a sound on the radio
In stereo in the static age
The static age

Maybe sometimes I use words, too harsh at times to describe music that people really like. But I want people to see what is going on in this world. Some musicians, are stepping forward, trying to make these issues known with their music, but yet these music are being regarded as simply noise.

And while this happens, they worship all the songs that have no meaning, only money. That, is sad. Really sad.

And that's why I feel so strongly.

Fuck

2010-08-14T00:54:00.002+08:00

When you stop thinking about how fucked up your life is, you're fucked.
The same concept as, you're screwed when your teachers stop scolding you.

I think my life is great, with a little bit of screw up here and there. I like it this way. Keeps me in check.

Work has been good too. This project is even harder than the previous one. Expectations of me is, I would say, is much higher. It's ok. I put myself through shit, and when I conquer those shit, I'll know I'm totally different.

Like today. I managed to understand, edit, and worked my way through fucking PHP. Proud of myself.

One day. One day you will know me. The real me.

600th

2010-08-13T00:26:00.002+08:00

This post marks the 600th post of this blog. Nope. Not happy and cheery. More like, reflective.

Memories. Loads of them on this blog right here. Been through all the ups, all the downs. All the happiness, all the sorrows.

I know I'm no longer a kid. I'm growing up, hard and fast. Now I'm 18. Soon I'll be 19, I'll be 20, I'll be 21, I'll serve the army, I'll have my family. Perhaps the day when I look back, perhaps at 30th birthday, 40th birthday. I'll look back and say, I grew up, with my values, the right way.

I'll keep writing here on this blog, and when I'm successful (or not), I'll publish this blog, with every single blogspot, every single picture; The Life of Me, as a book. Perhaps no one will read it. No one will buy it. But this will be the book, that defines my life.

Who will walk in to my life. Who will walk out.

Lets find out.

Haircut

2010-08-11T17:36:00.002+08:00

Went for a haircut on a moment of impulse. Kind of like it =)

CNPL

2010-08-10T23:29:00.002+08:00

I'm back working there. Same old shit. Handling their website for them. I'm on a much tighter deadline this time round though.

Apart from that, school's out (did I mention that already?)

Went to buy an external hard disk today, to back up my iMac with TimeMachine. Handy little tool. Now I'm not worried about my files.

Flying off to panda land in a few weeks time. Lets hope that that I don't get homesick, and the trip to be awesome.

Peace.

Holidays

2010-08-08T17:35:00.002+08:00

My 1st long break since I entered poly, which ironically, it was only May that I started school, and now I'm already having a break that's close to 3 months.

Fortunately for me, I'm flying to China, WuHan, in another 5 weeks time, so I got something to do over my long break. It's like a 5 weeks overseas immersion programme, where I'll get to study and live there for 5 weeks. Sounds pretty awesome.

Last day of school was kind of, weird for me. It's not exactly the best feelings. The holiday mood was not extremely strong. I kind of, didn't want the holidays to start. I'm gonna miss hanging out with people in the class. That's for sure.

Mr Sang Hong is leaving the whole teaching career too. So in a way, we are his last class ever. Which on the whole, is pretty amazing. Mr Sang Hong is a special kind of tutor, who was very very kind to our class. He isn't exactly the most popular kind of tutor around, but he is unique. He will be missed.

I'll miss T108 too.

Time to start on my workout again.

Wednesday, Friday - Morning jogs before I head to work
Tuesday, Thursday, Saturday - Gym
Sunday, Monday - Rest

And abstaining from junk food, sugared drinks, plus more protein.

Busy

2010-08-04T00:43:00.001+08:00

Won't be blogging, until Friday.

Peace.

Of hopes and expectations

2010-07-26T16:04:00.002+08:00

Final assignments are all due next week, on different days. This week is gonna be more crazy though, because this week is where most of the work is done. Don't feel like writing much now.
I WANT THIS FOR MY MACBOOK. It ain't gonna be cheap though. Shall stick to my 4 bucks stickers that I plan to get soon.

I want a few albums too.

T108

2010-07-25T14:54:00.003+08:00

Yup that's my class T108. I like my class alot, like alot. A pity we're gonna get split up since more than half of us are gonna go China together. I feel kind of sad.

Assignment's been killing us. Ok maybe not everyone, but I am feeling the stress from it. Thank goodness the sem is gonna be over in 2 weeks, or effectively 10 schooling days.

I'm not too looking forward to the sem break though. Most of my awesome classmates are gonna be involved in YOG, which makes them unavailable for awesome times. =( I speculate myself to spend the 1st 4 weeks of my holidays working, giving tuition, helping out at VS for their D&T, and working.

Sounds totally fun. The only rewarding part of this is the amount of money I'm getting. Win.

Break

2010-07-22T00:13:00.002+08:00

Give me a little break
Go drink some coffee
Try out something new
I might write something
The next time you come

Damn my assignments

thy sons are we, thy sons are we

2010-07-18T00:58:00.002+08:00

I have this sudden urge to sing the Victorian Anthem. And I just did. All alone, in my room, but yet I have this urge to cry. This song, sang many countless times, and will keep on singing in my heart. The brothers and bonds I got from here, can never be and will never be replaced by anything.

It's a regret that I could not attend the 134th Speech Day, because I had a graded speech. If not, I would have definitely skipped class to attend this event. This place where I grew from a boy to a man, how I miss you so.

Every time I walk pass the gates of Victoria, I know I'm home.

Pain

2010-07-16T20:58:00.001+08:00

The pain of losing.
The pain of sadness.
The pain of numbness.
The pain of pain.

The sad revelations.

Two Face

2010-07-16T20:50:00.002+08:00

We live in the world, where we wear a mask to everyone. Most of us do that to most people anyway. In order to protect others ego, and to avoid awkwardness when working with them, we choose to play nice.

When you can't play nice anymore, that's when things turn ugly. Like really ugly. It's fortunate that, I have rarely done that before. It's unfortunate that I have to play nice too.

If you're trying to push it, my advice to you is, don't push it. I rarely lose my temper, doesn't mean I don't. I'm entitled to extreme mood changes once in a while too. Don't push it.

I love my classmates. I hope they love me too.

Last of the American Girls

2010-07-15T01:34:00.002+08:00

She puts her makeup on like graffiti on the walls of the heartland
She's got her little book of conspiracies right in her hand
She is paranoid like endangered species headed into extinction
She is one of a kind, well, she's the last of the American girls

Radio at 8am tomorrow. I'm gonna go sleep soon. 3 more weeks of hell and I can taste freedom. I love poly life anyway.

Such an unexpected turn of events too.

Dave Matthews Band - What Would You Say

2010-07-12T08:17:00.005+08:00

That's the song currently that's playing in my iPod right now, as I seat at the benches near my classroom, waiting for class to start. It's a really good song by the way. You guys should have a listen. I'm wearing an orange t-shirt right now. I'm proud to wear it. Damn freaking proud.

Yes they lost. By a mere one goal margin. I wouldn't even bother to talk about the whole game. Both teams played well, apart from the bad fouls that were committed. Serious reds that should have been given, should have been given out. Both for Netherlands and Spain.

What I cannot understand, is that despite the deflection off a Spain player, and yet a goal kick was given to Spain, and what's worst, is that the goal kick was the one that led up to the 1-0 defeat at the hands of Spain. I cannot understand that, and I will stand by my team regarding this. Sorry Howard, but your referee-ing was plain bullshit for this match.

FIFA claimed that 96% of the decision made the the referees in the World Cup was good, so overall it's good. They haven't considered the lousy 4% that actually changed the whole flow of some games. The best example I can give is the disallowed goal for England. That could have proved to have set Germany back. But they weren't given the chance to.

But it's over.

I reached school about at about 730, because I took the earliest bus I can, and now I'm here, feeling like a zombie because I didn't sleep at all. I don't even know how I am gonna make it past today without feeling fucked up. I sure as hell did not enjoy the defeat, especially with such conditions, but I got more things to look forward to right now.

For example, I've got a goal of my own to score too.

Netherlands

2010-07-09T00:01:00.003+08:00

Something tells me that there's something seriously wrong with me. How could I not have blogged about Holland being in the Finals of World Cup 2010. This is really exciting to me. I started to watch them play under the influence of Bong, at the Euros 2008.

Prior to supporting them, I was an England fan, but they disappointed me over and over again. With their sluggish performance at the Euros, it really hit the bottom line. England stopped playing good football. They had all the good players in the world, but they just weren't giving any results. Their miserable failure in the World Cup just proved me right again.

I'm glad I did not have to pain myself with that disappointment this time round.

Instead, Holland did me proud. I remembered that during the Euros 2008, I stayed up, and Bong told me Holland was playing. So I just decided to stream and watch for fun. I was thrilled by them. They did not have extremely beautiful one touch passes like Spain, nor the defensive line of Italy. Rather they had the makings of a sleeping lion, which never misses when it wakes up to pound for a prey.

That was what they told me. Holland's defensive line is not the best in the world, but they have an offense that can create chances from any kind of situation. I got hooked by that fact. In this World Cup, after a great start with no losses, they were matched to meet Brazil, I told myself, if they can win Brazil, they can win the World Cup.

Bong and I went to watch the match at Kovan Macs, and the atmosphere was great. Although Brazil took the lead in just 10 minutes, Holland fought, and fought hard. They scored 2 goals in the 2nd half to win Brazil. Bong and I screamed at their goals. It was an astonishing moment for me. They really won. Although their first goal was an own goal, you can't deny that Holland started to open up chances for themselves, and it was the threat from Holland that caused Brazil to make that blunder. Robben dived a lot. We all saw, but he was truly man marked in that match too. I lost count of the number of times he fell flat on his face, but they pulled through.

They played past the the whole tournament, won the quarter finals against Brazil, the semi finals against Uruguay, and now, they are gonna face off Spain in the Finals coming Monday morning. Holland will win. The lion will be awoken. I'm sure of it.

¡Viva La Gloria!

2010-07-08T21:59:00.004+08:00

Hey Gloria are you standing close to the edge
Look out to the setting sun
The brink of your vision
Eternal youth is a landscape of the lie
The cracks on my skin can prove
As the years will testify
Say your prayers and light a fire
Were going to start a war
Your slogans a gun for hire
It’s what we waited for
Hey Gloria, this is why were on the edge
The fight of our lives been drawn to this undying love.

Beautiful beautiful song. Felt all the angst and emotions coming from him in this song. The sadness, the anxiety, the anger, the tension. As usual, do yourself a favour and click play on the video above.

School today's been rather uneventful, with nothing really major going on. Radio was fine.

Ok no. It was quite a bit of a waste of time, because I spent over 2 hours looking at these 3 girls stalk people online. And sharing their stalking experiences. Just check out their intense concentration and evil grin.

Writcomm was, funny. I got killed by Mr Sharpe with his gun app. I do hope I've redeemed myself though. Hehe.

One of my classmate is leaving us for her studies in Australia. I won't be a hypocrite, and lie that I'll miss her or any fake nonsense. Face it, I don't exactly talk to her much. She's gonna be one of those people in my life that I bid my goodbyes to, and maybe never see again for the rest my life. That's just how it is.

Having said that, we did cross our path in this point in my life, so when she chose to head somewhere else, all I can say is, I wish her well and all the best for the path that she had chosen to undertake. There isn't really much I can say to her except for this.

I wouldn't say nonsense such as, 'Thank you for being part of my life', or 'I'll remember all the good times we had', because there were none of it there in the first place.

But all in all, Dal, I wish you well.

Wipeout

2010-07-07T15:51:00.003+08:00

This is a really a fucking epic song. Do yourself a favour, and click play to listen to one the masterpiece, that musicians in our times can only hope to achieve

I wanted to blog yesterday, but the Netherlands match kept me busy, so it was delayed. Heh. The match was good. I gotta admit that Netherlands did not play the most beautiful football, but they played with ferocity on the offense in the 2nd half, and got the job done as usual.

The 1st goal from Netherlands, I gotta say, definitely one of the goals of World Cup that will go down in history. Beautiful shot from way outside of the box, to the top right hand corner. Amazing shot that the keeper could not do much about it.

School's fine pretty fine so far. No biggie happening, except for my SocPsy test yesterday. It was not a complete disaster, but not something to be happy about either. I gotta leave for school soon, as I have CCA on this day where I have no tutorial on at all.

But I promised Dan I'll go, and so, RANDALL YOU BETTER COME AS WELL.

SocPsy

2010-07-06T01:07:00.001+08:00

is fucking me up. Maybe I'll talk about how fuck up I am later.

FML

Top of my Charts

2010-07-04T21:11:00.004+08:00

Currently, Have A Nice Day and Nightrain is on the top of my playlist. 2 worthy songs. They are trailed closely by Viva la Gloria, a good song by Green Day. The rest of the songs on my Top 50 are good songs too. Have a listen if you want something fresh on your playlist.

What's your chart like?

Oh, no nonsense like Justin Bieber and Miley Cyrus though. I'll slap you.

Everlasting Love

2010-07-03T18:49:00.003+08:00

Open up your eyes, then you realise.
Here I stand with my everlasting love.
Need you by my side.
Girl to be my bride.
Never be denied everlasting love....

I never had a thing for song like this, but this song, really caught my attention.

Such simple lyrics and thoughts, but yet says so much to a person. It certainly caught my emotions too. I'll much rather that the chorus is repeat when it was sang for the second time though. That would have really worked for me

I certainly wonder. Do you wonder? I wonder if you do.

SocPsy test next week is like killing me. I gotta study for it, I am studying for it, but it seems like I'm gonna fail miserably anyways. How how how?

The Flying Dutchman

2010-07-03T01:23:00.003+08:00

The Dutch played a good game today. Despite all the odds that were against them, against Robben, they played like a champ. He played like a champ.

Screaming at Macs with all the other football fans. It feels fucking pure and fucking good. It was especially good watching with Bong, a fellow Holland fan. We screamed, we laughed, we jumped, we shouted, together. What a great way to spend the night.

Holland can get to the finals, if they play well in the quarter finals. I'll be glad. Here's a jackface to all you who said Holland sucks. They are a great team. ORANJE!!!

Have A Nice Day

2010-07-01T16:54:00.003+08:00

Shining like a diamond, rolling with the dice
Standing on the ledge and show the wind how to fly

This was my favourite song when I first started listening to music. But I started to dislike this song after sometime, for reasons I can remember no more. Recently, perhaps it's the need for some form of motivation, the lines above really caught my ears.

It's like a shoutback to life that there's nothing we cannot handle.

Oh, anyways, Jing Wen is outside at my cousin's room tutoring him english. I wonder if she'll make a good teacher. Hahah oh wells. I wonder. Shall ask her later.

I'M FUCKING SLEEPY AND I WANT TO SLEEP.

Turn The Page

2010-06-30T17:13:00.003+08:00

On a long and lonesome highway,
East of Omaha
You can listen to the engines
Moanin' out it's one old song
You can think about the woman,
Or the girl you knew the night before
But your thoughts will soon be wanderin',
The way they always do
When you're ridin' 16 hours,
And there's nothin' much to do
And you don't feel much like ridin',
You just wish the trip was through

This song is surprisingly, heartfelt. Some of Metallica's stronger, emotional work. Give it a chance. You wont' regret it. Turn The Page. Do yourself a favour and go have a listen.

To sum up half my day today; a good night's sleep, a smooth journey to school, a good class, a bad time studying socpsy. Haha. Gonna leave the library soon though. Gonna go have dinner and go for song composing club!

Oh, which reminds me, I should listen to the metronome. Ah, and I wanna shit too! @_@ HOW HOW HOW. Ok Theon is leaving. BYE BYE.

Haha ok I guess I should get going soon. OH. IM GOING TO CHINA! On September 11 =) Don't miss me people!

To be a better man

2010-06-29T19:06:00.002+08:00

As my soul heals the shame
I will grow through this pain
Lord I'm doing all I can
To be a better man

I don't really know how to handle it this time round. One bad move and it could be result in disastrous consequences. That's the last thing that I want. I might really fuck this up badly.

But yet at the same time, 'Either bet big or go home'.

I can't answer myself. Bet or not bet. I hate moments like this.

Can't take my eyes off you.

2010-06-29T00:39:00.002+08:00

Love this song. This song is such a classic, and it says so much in that span of a few minutes. Beautiful beautiful song. This is the kind of song, I'll pull it out once in a while to savour, and to be reminded why music is beautiful

I yearn for someone at times. We are all humans. Just humans.

Take a look at this if you would. Feedbacks are welcomed.
http://www.threadless.com/critique/70849/Peace_To_The_World

James Hetfield

2010-06-28T18:04:00.003+08:00

So in IS class today, we were supposed to discuss on media and it's effect on us.
I decided to share about James Hetfield. The first response I got from everyone was, 'Who's that?'

And my tutor threw me a skeptical look

James fucking Hetfield, one of the best metal riff writer and song writer that existed on the metal scene, and you ask me who he is?

Well this is Hetfield

Well over 40 (or 50), and still rocking his balls off. He stays true to what he says, and what he plays. His dream at 17/18, was to be in the best Metal band. And here he is, he did it. With Metallica.

Fade to Black

Life it seems will fade away
Drifting further everyday
Getting lost within myself
Nothing matters no one else
I have lost the will to live Simply nothing more to give
There is nothing more for me
Need the end to set me free

Things not what they used to be Missing one inside of me
Deadly loss this cant be real
Cannot stand this hell i feel
Emptiness is filling me To the point of agony
Growing darkness taking dawn
I was me but now, hes gone

No one but me can save myself, but its too late
Now i cant think, think why i should even try

Yesterday seems as though it never existed
Death greets me warm, now i will just say goodbye
Goodbye

Just this song alone, with that riff and the intro of this song, shows how great of a writer he is. The only sad thing is that his vocals is not as good as it used to be; damaged his vocal cords.

If you're interested, do yourself a favour, go to youtube, search for performance of 'Fade to Black', 'Seek and Destroy', 'Enter Sandman', 'Hit The Lights' and 'Whiplash'. They are sure to give you a head banging good time. But you know what is one of the most awesome thing? He wrote 'Blackened', a song about pollution, and saving the Earth, back in 1980s, way ahead of everyone, way before anyone even thought it was a problem. He said it, through his songs.

One of my favourite quote from him, 'Regret, it's a screwed up word'

To all those that still believe in Rock 'n Roll, stay true, and peace. Bless you.

02:05

2010-06-28T02:05:00.000+08:00

I'm staying up to help teo with his website. But I guess i'm gonna go sleep soon.

I need something to brighten up my day tomorrow. Will you? =)

Rockefeller

2010-06-27T22:28:00.003+08:00

This is such a cool word right? What does it mean? Dictionary.com says...

Rockefeller 1
Rockefeller, John D. (1839–1937), U.S. industrialist and philanthropist; full name John Davison Rockefeller. He founded the Standard Oil Company in 1870 and, by 1880, exercised a virtual monopoly over oil refining in the U.S. Both he and his son, John D. Rockefeller Jr. (1874–1960), established many philanthropic institutions, including the Rockefeller Foundation in 1913. Rockefeller Center in New York City was built in the 1930s.

Rockefeller 2
Rockefeller, John D., IV (1937–), U.S. politician; known as Jay. A Democrat, he was governor of West Virginia 1976–84 and a U.S. senator from 1984. He was the great-grandson of John D. Rockefeller and the nephew of Nelson Rockefeller.

Rockefeller 3

Rockefeller, Nelson Aldrich (1908–79), U.S. statesman. A moderate Republican, he served as governor of New York 1959–73 and vice president of the U.S. 1974–77. He was the son of John D. Rockefeller Jr.

School's back in tomorrow once again. And damn, England's losing 2-1 to Germany now. Somehow I hope that Germany will lose, to shut the mouth of those people who say Germany will win the World Cup.

Lets face it. The only thing I like about Germany is the design of their jersey.

Mehh. Lets not talk soccer here. The World Cup sucks anyways. Friends are all losing money. Why bet on that stupid ball man. Why?

Ah ok. Whatever. Jailbreaking OS 4 on my iPod Touch. Yay.

I want to.

2010-06-27T03:22:00.002+08:00

There are many things I want to do in my life.
So much, I can't really list them all.

Bungee Jump
Sky dive
Drink until my head burst
Earn big bucks
Grow up
Race in a car race
Play a show in Wembley
Release a LP
Play gigs
Play as much music as I can, while I'm young
Scuba Dive
Get my car license
Look at shooting stars
Visit Rome
Go to the States
Explore the world
Watch a Chelsea match
Attend a Metallica concert
Shake hands with my idols
Give someone I really love a nice hug
Everything's gonna be ok

Yknow how life likes to take a bite back at you sometimes? I'm glad I'm over this, if not I'll be ripping myself out. I've got my life waiting for me right now.

The Wager

2010-06-26T23:09:00.005+08:00

Now and then when I see your face
She takes me to that special place
That if I stare too long
I'll probably break down and cry

Went to a Jing Wen's church for a movie today. The movie really sucked though. All the ideas stated inside were too far fetched. A good dinner at Changing Appetite saved the day though. Jacq was supposed to come for the movie too, but she pangseh-ed me coz she woke up at 5pm. Luckily Lennon was there, so I was relatively safe. Theresa and Jacq came for dinner though.

The holidays are almost over. Tomorrow is like the last day of hols. I plan to spend it by studying for socpsy, and finish up all my work that I have not. AND LOOKING FORWARD TO CHINA!

This has been an interesting holiday for me. New start for me? I wonder. But I sure as hell am gonna appreciate this new start given to me.

Stand by me.

2010-06-25T16:26:00.002+08:00

When the night has come

And the land is dark
And the moon
Is the only light we'll see

Studying in VS now. The club is have a one day camp, so I came back to look see look see.
Socpsy is somewhat killing my braincells now?

I'm tired and sleepy, and not to mention my ass hurts. I want a bed with aircon. Yeah, that'll really really help. Yay Nightrain is playing on my iPod now. That somewhat helped a bit. Heading out tomorrow. I hope it turns out fun.

Just being curious. What are some of your favourite albums? I love these man.

Tag on my board share some with me? =)

Oh did you know that you're missed?

Peace To The World

2010-06-23T18:52:00.000+08:00

Submitted this for threadless. Wonder how it will turn out. Help me score it! =)

Miscommunication

2010-06-21T16:32:00.002+08:00

and mis-portrayal, including the encoding and decoding of verbal and non-verbal communication, which means spoken language, body language and para language can lead to

misunderstandings.

But I guess being a male with his pride affects this process too. Too young, too proud, to understand

Chelsea

2010-06-21T06:29:00.003+08:00

I met up with the guys yesterday (actually Nat, Terence and Zheng Yu just left my house), but I met up with the whole group of them to have a good dinner, some nice LAN and some crashed my place. My birthday was a good chance to see everyone; Zhong Yi, Zheng Yu, Daniel, Drew, Rome, Max, Teo, Nat and Darrell. Zheng Xian didn't come but it's fine.

Long time since we all gathered together, and though short, but it was great seeing them. And I really really didn't expect this:

Although this made my 18th a lot better, but nothing beats the company. Honestly. I enjoy celebrating my birthday with you guys; simple yet fun. You guys have stuck it out there with me through all the shit that I went through and, I thank you.

I gotta go sleep now. It's almost 7, and I gotta wake up by 11 later.

My Kampung Style Birthday

2010-06-20T14:19:00.004+08:00

Zhong Yi

2010-06-19T13:10:00.002+08:00

I'm happy for my best pal. Some of us will know why =)

18 on 18

2010-06-19T03:17:00.002+08:00

Yes. As you might already know, it was my 18th birthday yesterday. First, I received a record number of wishes this year, so it's impossible to list out all that wished me, but know that your well wishes are much appreciated!

I feel loved.

Went to register for my basic theory earlier. The lady wished me happy birthday too! Haha. So went to meet Chloe for Toy Story 3 (last min plans), which was a good movie by the way. Oh, and I met Leroy on the train back to Kovan too. It was really good seeing him.

Went to meet Cheryl after that (she was 1 hour plus late), for some CHOMP. Haha. Chloe's treat today, so it was all good, And the food was good too. I loved it. Talking about the good ol times, the panda boy, the a guy. Love catching up with her.

Finally, a bit of pool and my cake cutting and eating! Which was super funny. We ate it in kampong style; we squat on the floor and ate from the box. Damn epic. I love these people

Having an awesome msn convo with Randall nao. Haha. Gonna sleep soon though. Pictures next time!

Oh dear. I can go to jail.

2010-06-18T10:28:00.005+08:00

I woke up this morning, feeling a little different.

I woke up this morning, knowing I can buy alchohol, cigarettes, watch M18 movie, be thrown into jail, and most importantly, get my driving license.

18 is one of my most significant age of my life to me. It opens so many new doors for me, and at the same time, telling me that I should be more mature as I have a responsibility to those around me. This year, is also the start of my poly life, so you can say that 18th this year is full of changes too.

I should give myself a little pat on the back, that I stayed alive until now, and wish myself a little Happy 18th Birthday.

What will the rest of my life hold for me? We'll find out.

Music: The Epics

2010-06-17T13:52:00.005+08:00

Many of you already know that music really is an important part of my life. Just like chocolate milk and cheese, I can't imagine life without music.

So here are some of the epic lines in some songs that I heard over the years.

Guns & Roses - Nightrain
I got one chance left in a nine live cat
I got a dog eat dog sly smile

Matchbox Twenty - All I Need
Everybody's trusting in the heart
Like the heart don't lie

Matchbox Twenty - Could I Be You
Well now, you're laughing out loud
At just the thought of being alive
And I was wondering
Could I just be you tonight

Green Day - Longview
When masturbation's lost its fun

Green Day - St Jimmy
My name is Jimmy and you'd better not wear it out
Suicide commando that your mama talked about
King of the forty thieves and I'm here to represent
The needle in the vein of the establishment

Green Day - 21st Century Breakdown
We are the class of the class of '13
Born in the era of humility
We are the desperate in the decline
Raised by the bastards of 1969

Megadeth - A Tout le Monde
Moving on is a simple thing
What it leaves behind is hard

Megadeth - Symphony of Destruction
Just like the Pied Piper
Led rats through the streets
We dance like marionettes
Swaying to the symphony
Of destruction

Posion - Every Rose Has It's Thorns
Every rose has its thorn
Just like every night has its dawn
Just like every cowboy sings his sad, sad song
Every rose has its thorn

ZZ Top - Sharp Dressed Man
'Cause every girl crazy 'bout a sharp dressed man

It's evident who are some of my favourite songwriters. I think Billie Joe Armstrong and Dave Mustaine write some great lyrics. They are awesome, just like their music.

Chocolate Milk.

2010-06-16T21:41:00.001+08:00

Lets talk about something fun today. As you might have already seen on Facebook, I had a really really bad day today. Last night was a pretty bad night too. I couldn't sleep, and when I finally fell asleep, I had nightmares.

But all the bad stuff aside, lets talk, about my favorite drink; Chocolate Milk.

Why do I love chocolate milk. I must, I believe it stems from my love of chocolate. I love to eat chocolate. Chocolate rules my world. I can't imagine what life would be without chocolate. Just like cheese, but I can't imagine drinking Cheese Milk.

But why chocolate milk. Imagine ice, cold, chocolate flowing down your throat in liquid form, with your tongue sending all frequencies of orgasm to your brain, and you feel so much more alive. That, my friend, is one of the very important reason why I drink chocolate milk.

And mind you, not just any chocolate milk will do. As of now, my favorite is the ones from HL. I can't really give you a logical explanation on why HL, but it's just nice. Not too sweet, not too bland, enough chocolate, and I like it.

Unlike the crap that is seating my fridge right now, HL is my definite choice. Some might say that Meiji is better, and all, but let assure you this, THIS IS JUST A FREAKING PERSONAL CHOICE.

Maybe you should just drop tag on -----> and tell me your favorite drink. If you want to.

Oh, and people, drink it in moderation. Plain water is still the way to go. Remember kids, 8 glasses of water a day.

Plant vs Zombies

2010-06-16T14:48:00.003+08:00

I wanted to play that, but I've not completed my SocPsy notes from yesterday, so I shall resist the temptation and finish my work first.

Studied for a good five hours ytd. I am proud of myself. Time to do more! G was nice to come and study with me, though she came quite late, but it's ok. It's ok. Somehow, I miss school days, though I'm not supposed to. I should be enjoying my holidays. But I'm not =(

Oh, and last night was one of the worst nights I have, not able to sleep till 7am. =(

Mug

2010-06-15T11:38:00.001+08:00

Anyone want to join me to go studying? Compass Point.

Sleep

2010-06-15T01:01:00.006+08:00

Sleep is important. Sleep is good. It's time to sleep. Goodnight everybody.

I can't think of a cool title so this is it.

2010-06-14T21:28:00.003+08:00

Okay people. Lets face it. We have to mug.

So who's up for mugging tomorrow. Preferably Compass Point Burger King, but anywhere will do, honestly. You only have to fulfill the following criteria.

1) You know me, and I know you
2) You're cool and hippy just like me
3) You can take my nonsense
4) You're not more than 2 years younger/older than me
5) You are lovable

If you fulfill all the above criteria, and you would like to apply for a shot to go study with me, please submit your application to 96180214 in the following format

Name (space) Location (space) Time

Deadline: 12 midnight on 14 June 2010.

Disclaimer: This is not a 'first-come-first-serve' basis. This is a 'I-pick-who-I-like-the-most' basis.

OK FUCK WHO WANT STUDY JUST SMS/CALL/MSN ME. BAI BAI.

Dinner

2010-06-14T10:29:00.002+08:00

I used to look forward to dinner. Besides the obvious part about good food, it really is good family bonding time. Just small talks about each other's lives mean alot to me. I guess it's these little little time that will bring us together.

However, I've found dinner affairs to be increasingly tiring and it became more like a chore. Why do I say so? Now my usual dinner would be either, I eat by myself and save food for those who are not home yet, or a packed rice in front of my computer screen.

This ain't healthy man, but what can I do. I can't have dinner too late, but my siblings are either late from work/school, or they are not having dinner at home, at all. Now, the family enjoys a good home cooked meal together, once every two or three blue moons.

What can I say?

tumblr

2010-06-13T17:01:00.004+08:00

I gave in and created a tumblr account, and I realised that it would be more apt for me to post my short posts, notable quotes, fun facts and all kinds of nonsense over there.

Not that there's no nonsense here. But in smaller amount =)

http://iambeno.tumblr.com

Answer to the chem joke earlier, from the previous post:
If H2O is water, what is H2O4?
Drinking (4 = for)

Now people, please laugh.

3.3

2010-06-13T12:11:00.003+08:00

Just woke up.

I feel slightly lethargic though. How how how. Die lor. Ok I'm not really making much sense here actually. Day 1 of holidays was, sleepy.

Tried to sleep at 5pm, but the stupid drilling from upstair (or downstairs), came on and did not stop till 8pm. After 2 unsuccessful hours, I gave up sleeping.

I need a haircut.

I need to register for my basic theory soon. (HELL YEAH)

I need to study.

I need to work on my 2 projects over the hols.

Oh dear. Bye people.

Here's a chem joke:

If H2O is water, what is H2O4? (Answers will be revealed on my next post, most probably tonight or tomorrow)

Holiday One

2010-06-12T02:29:00.001+08:00

So my 1st term in Ngee Ann MCM has ended. I like the way it ended.

I think this is quite a, somewhat deserved break for me personally. I think I put in more effort in my work this term, than I imagined I would have. This is a surprise, but let's see how long I last before I decide to start slacking.

Been a fruitful term for me. I love my current modules, and made friends. Quite a good number of naise people around me. A little unexpected, and I love the way my class is fun but not overboard. Not overly disruptive in lessons, but yet fun and spontaneous. Oh, and I think I'm keeping up in terms of results? I guess. I can't afford not to. I want a good future for myself. I need it. I can't afford to disappoint anyone anymore. Not even myself.

I like the way my life is picking back up on me again. I like it this way.

Oh, and if any T108 people reading this, know that you guys are really awesome.

Lien Ying Chow Library

2010-06-11T14:21:00.002+08:00

At the library with Theresa, Grace and Andy. Oh. The 2 jacqs just came. And one of the just whacked me in the head. Go away man.

Gonna go submit my cheena form soonish.

LOL. The convo about softball is funny

Grace: So what do you all do at softball training
Jacq: Nothing proper yet. Just throw, run, throw, run, throw.
Andy: Isn't that training for dogs?

Impromptu speech soon. Someone save me from this.

Crazy Thursday

2010-06-10T16:45:00.005+08:00

The day started with me, waking at 6.20. Later than I need to. So I rushed out of the house, caught the 7am shuttle bus, and somehow managed to reach school at 7.30.

Radio was just blah, installing ProTools and learning how to use it. Just between you and me, I think radio was abit of waste time today. AND MR JASON CHOW NEH COME. And so, at 10.31 (or around there), radio ended

Went for class lunch at Makan Place, just like every Thurs.

Then, Jing Wen went to buy barley. And so the fun begins.

Apparently she 'lost' her phone, but she kept insisting that we took it. Went to OurSpace@72, to the TV room, and chilled there. Oh, and caught Ryan on Radio Heatwave. Therefore, we decided to delicate a song for Jing Wen and her lost phone.

Ryan actually read the 1st comment out. It was fucking hilarious. Oh, and her phone magically appeared later on anyways.

After chilling, time for Writcom class. It ended early anyways.

151-ed home, and here's the real deal. After I alighted, I realised my phone was not in my pocket. So I ran after the bus, to the next bus stop. Guess what, I couldn't catch it. When all hopes were lost, an auntie at the next bus stop seemed to be waiting for someone, and in her hands, was MY PHONE. So she alighted, and waited for me, to pass me back my phone.

Bless the auntie for alighting and wait for me, and bless myself for the good karma. I shall do more good deeds from now on. (y)

Oh, so that's roughly a day in school, if you're curious about my school life.

ps: Jing Wen was early for class today. That's something new.

ProTools

2010-06-10T08:56:00.002+08:00

So we all came to school, early in the morning, at 8am, to come to radio class, to install ProTool. (y)

It's taking sometime though. So sian. I kind of woke up late this morning, but I managed to reach school on time anyways. I'm quite zai. Shuttle bus ride was not comfortable though. Couldn't sleep.

Might be having a class lunch tmr. Hope it's fun as usual.

Oh, this whole week and next week will be specs day for me. Just so you know. Ah fuck. I'm just rambling on and on here.

Photos

2010-06-09T19:17:00.007+08:00

Just felt like posting the most memorable parts of my life. Thank you all of you who were there with me.

Sec 1 Class Photo. Spot me?

Best IT Club photo ever

The Sec 2 me. The 'omg-im-so-good-looking' me

My 1st sec 3 class photo, where I found some of my closest friends

My awesome 17th birthday with some of my closest friends

My graduation, with one of the best class ever

My O Level haircut. The 'see-already-can-jizz' haircut

Minds Cafe with my close friends made through selling ipods =)

Chomp Chomp with Chloe and Cheryl =)

Zheng Xian's 18th birthday, where I got a scar on my finger =)

The ipod people once again. 'Family' photo

Before JoJo enlisted

Bonus pic =)

HP

2010-06-09T18:22:00.003+08:00

No school today. I repeat. NO SCHOOL TODAY.

I love this week man. Monday and Wednesday no school. This is the sex man. And I'm done with all my assignments due this week, so I'm free. I updated my CV earlier, so it looks much nicer nao.

Today, the new printer's finally getting delivered. Oo. Someone just pressed the bell. It's HERE. Like finally. The 1st new decent printer I had in 10 years. I'm not joking.

The current printer that I'm using, the manual feed one; I had it since I was 7 or 8. Now I'm already 18. Ok gonna go install it. =)

Update: Installed. Yay. Like yay.

ps: On the average, I score about 8/9 out of 10 for being a Chao Ah Beng. Fuck me.

SocPsy

2010-06-08T23:41:00.002+08:00

Hello world. So currently, I'm sitting in my chair, shifting around, here and there, praying hard that I don't need to go school for socpsy consultation tomorrow. Which is highly likely impossible. I don't think I did well for my journal nor the project one. =(

This sucks. If I don't need to go consultation, then I can sleep more, no need waste time travelling, do my radio from the comfort of my home

UPDATE: I DON'T NEED GO CONSULTATION. WOOHOO I'M A HAPPY KID NOW. CAN SLEEP IN PEACE.

2 more

2010-06-07T23:34:00.001+08:00

There's this guy who impersonated me on my tagboard. I wonder who.

Oh, and if you read my blog, drop a tag so I know who's stalking me ok =)

Hmm.

2010-06-07T22:57:00.004+08:00

Today, wasn't exactly the best of day. Some of you might know, that I did a notice board frame for VS. Finally saw it today. I like it a lot personally. Not because I designed it, but I think it suit the location as well. The picture on the left, was the one I did in concept art. The picture on the right, is the actual one. Almost 100% replica man. (y)

Today went to celebrate my bro's birthday. I wasn't in the best mood though. My mum told me its 7.30, but apparently they arrived an hour earlier. So I rushed down from VS, to Clarke Quay, and guess what, everyone finished eating except for me.

Not that it's anyone's fault, but it just feels shitty.

By the way~

I need:

A pair of slippers
A new pair of spectacles
CDs
A new macbook sleeve

How how how?

The Asshole

2010-06-06T03:00:00.002+08:00

Hi people. The asshole is back. If you're wondering who the asshole is, it's me. I'll be blunt with you. I think I'm an asshole (at times). But I'm a nice asshole. I think. What do you think?

I guess after some gloomy days in my life, the sun is out to shine again. Things are definitely picking up for me again. I guess I learnt how to look past certain things myself. Last week of school is coming, then it's the holidays. I've got a 2 weeks break, which can certainly help me to recharge.

So for all of you who wants to meet me, please take note that you have to do advance booking to prevent any possible disappointment. (Sorry I'm just that high in demand)

It's 3am right now. I should really be sleeping. Jamming with The Gellos later on. It'll be fun I guess. Tirmizi is helping me to set up my bass. Apparently my action is really way too high. No wonder it's a little hard to play my bass. Heh. It's a good chance to get my bass back in tune too.

It's nice to have people trusting you, sharing things about themselves to you. You feel more, appreciated. Adds a different meaning to the day. That was a good end to the school week. Somewhat made my day.

Met up with Cheryl and Chloe just now, for chomp. It was good seeing Cheryl again. Everytime I see her, just reminds me on how this friendship didn't come easy, and such a valuable one. It's always good hanging out at the same spot, talking about all sorts of nonsense (though usually it ends up at future plans), but hey, we are old enough that we need to plan for our future right.

Turning 18 in 2 weeks time. Once I turn 18, much newer and bigger doors open for me. I might have to re-evaluate how I should lead my life too. Now that I turn 18, I feel like I have a bigger responsibility to all those younger kids around me. I don't mean those that are classmates, but rather, those that are really young.

Then again, 18's not that old, is it?

(y)

2010-06-04T23:53:00.002+08:00

Coz every girl's crazy bout a sharp dressed man.

This song is super sexy man.

Anyways, met up with yunwei and joel ytd! Poor Joel enlisting, so I dragged my tired and lazy ass to meet them. Time well spent with them, like seriously. A pity Erly couldn't come, but I enjoyed good time and good food with the 2 of them (y)

Class this week had been awesome. The worst week of the term is now over. 1 more week and the holidays will be here. T108's been awesome too. I love the class. Hang in there yeah?

Grace wants a picnic at botanic gardens LOL

The Gellos

2010-06-01T11:33:00.003+08:00

After 3 months, we finally have a proper line up. I really enjoy playing with them. I think thanks to them, my creative is up and in fact, slightly overflowing

Sundays are like my happiest day now, out of all the days. Now I want to gig gig gig soon. I'm taking another step towards my dreams man, and I'm happy

ps: Ok I wrote these nonsense like 3 days ago. Now I'm tired and waiting for writcom to start. =(

Haircut

2010-05-29T22:54:00.000+08:00

A cute song I wrote today

Ba ba ba ba ba la ba ba
Ba ba ba ba ba la ba ba
Ba ba ba ba ba la ba ba

I need a new haircut
I don't like my hairstyle now
Someone tell me how

I want to dye my hair brown
But my school don't allow
Someone tell me how

Chorus
You want to tell me how
I want a new hair now
Give me some advice
Or you go away right now

Ba ba ba ba ba la ba ba
Ba ba ba ba ba la ba ba
Ba ba ba ba ba la ba ba

I told him what I want
But he cut the wrong hairstyle
Someone tell me how

I had to shave it off
But I think it looks bad now
Someone tell me how

Chorus x 2

This is really eff-ing funny

2010-05-29T01:19:00.002+08:00

Mickey Mouse is having a nasty divorce with Minnie Mouse. Mickey spoke to the judge about the separation.

"I'm sorry Mickey, but I can't legally separate you two on the grounds that Minnie is mentally insane..."

Mickey replied, "That's not what I meant when I said that she's f*cking Goofy!"

Went jamming with Bong earlier on. It was awesome. Played an original today. But we gotta keep working on it. We'll get there someday. Peace out yo

IM GOOD, IM THAT GOOD

2010-05-25T23:18:00.002+08:00

Enough, is enough. I just gotta get going and take nature take its course

I've wasted enough energy and smiles to this, and I shall be a happy boy. I stuck out with my own life motto, and that alone will be good enough

And SHIT HAPPENS. DEAL WITH IT.

YEAH.

I don't really have much to do for now, except to worry about the human documentary. =)

I'm so gonna jam the coming Friday, Sun, and maybe even Monday. I'm looking forward to those. SCC tmr's on too. So yeah! =)

Music and me

2010-05-24T23:33:00.000+08:00

I can't exactly describe this feeling. I was just browsing facebook and jumping around profiles, then I wondered, what's there to look forward to tomorrow. Guess what. Yup you guessed right. Nothing.

Except maybe meeting zhongyi and teo tmr night, But even that is not confirmed. But basically, there ain't much driving force to go school at all. Sometimes it just feel like a pain in the ass even.

The times I truly enjoy myself is when I'm playing with the band, thinking about all the endless possibilities we can achieve. But the thing is, that's only on Sundays. What about Mon to Sat? I meet up with friends every week on Sat, and so taking that out, what about Mon to Fri?

Other than assignments, I'm just keeping myself occupied with playing games, which ain't healthy for me. Any healthy mind building activity for me? Any suggestions?

I don't really know what to say anymore.

Monday Blues~

2010-05-24T09:03:00.002+08:00

So here I am, sitting in IS class. Class should have started by now, but apparently my tutor is caught in some jam due to traffic accident @_@. I wonder about that, but let's give her the benefit of doubt.

Jamming was awesome yesterday. I'm feeling home on the kit now. I wouldn't say I'm good now, but I came a long way to where I am today. Still remember the start of 2008 when I first started playing drums. I picked up a pair of drumsticks and just started imitating the video on youtube with an imaginary drum kit in front of me.

My first jamming session with Bong, JJ, and Ryan at Ebenex. It was damn funny actually. Epic fail actually. The first song that I played successfully with Bong was Won't Go Home Without You by Maroon 5. In fact, I still have the recording of it. Fucking funny if you ask me.

The way I started was like, as soon as I knew how the drumset looked like, I wanted to play in a band, and I had my first jamming session after barely a week. I could barely keep time or whatever. In fact, my timing was all over the place. I couldn't even hear what the others were playing.

This on and off shit just stayed that way for the whole year, with a bit of practice on VS's crappy drumset. Then Bong's A Levels came. I realise I needed to find new bandmates with jam with. I posted a notice on Soft, and one day I got a message from Aaron. Haha YEAP! I went to jam with them that night. I got slapped straight in the face on what I was lacking in as a drummer.

Aaron's a good drummer, and he gave me good advice, which actually played a very big part in my improvement over the past few months. I left the band due to some reasons after a very short while due to some reasons, and Aaron played drums instead. They formed Visibility Zero, though I didn't go to their first gig, but I'm sure it's eff-ing awesome.

So here I am now, playing with a regular band, and maybe I'll play my first gig in July or August. When people ask me how I learn drums, it's always fun to tell them, that I play air drums. Their reactions never cease to amuse me.

Week 5

2010-05-22T00:16:00.002+08:00

At 6 pm today (Friday), my Week 5 in Ngee Ann is over. School is mostly enjoyable, I'll say. I love school. But someway somehow, there's something missing. Can't really explain what. Meeting up with my Sec 4 class tomorrow. I'm really excited to see them again actually. It's been too long, too long.

I mean like, I love Ngee Ann, but I think, many Victorians who graduated with me would agree; VS is really a place we can call home. I find myself, feeling the need to go back to VS soon, really soon. To see the teachers again, to see the school again, to see the familiar faces again. It just sucks so bad, that I end so late on Fridays.

That being said, the past 5 weeks in school has been mostly, fun. And a good chance was handed to me, to grow up some more. I've learnt more about dealing with various aspects of myself. I learnt to understand that there are things that can't be forced, and I should wish the best for everyone. I too learnt that, I do have some form of analytical skills. Not that I'm a mind reader, but I can analyse.

I told Cheryl the other day, that I realised I've become more of an asshole after going poly, and I don't feel bad about. I said it to her in a joking manner, but to be honest, there's a certain degree of truth to it.

I feel myself going that direction, and if I don't reflect, I'm gonna become that self-centered and egoistic bastard, whom I'm hate. Great, now I hate myself. Rather, possible future me. It's worrying me, because I can't remember how I used to me. Or am I in the guys school to a mix studying environment kind of transition stage. I treat all my females friends the same way actually, but because we're close friends and that's why we keep in close contact. So it's safe to say they know me well

But what about here? After a few weeks in school, I realised no one actually knows me. Not that I am THAT bothered, but I wonder what impression do I leave to my new classmates. The classmates are awesome, as much as I know. I like my class. They're great and spontaneous. I love people like that. It's just that, I've been too comfortable changing environment and adapting myself, that I forgot my own basics.

I thought that I might have found people in Ngee Ann that might understand me better than the rest. But I guess I thought wrong. Or maybe you realised that you just hate my guts. I won't exactly say I'm not bothered by it, but life goes on right?

Like what's taught in SocPsy classes, "People interpret you through your actions, not intentions"

What would you say?

2010-05-18T00:48:00.001+08:00

You know how life just loves to make fun of you. it's like trying to remind you not to take things for granted. What we want, we gotta fight for it.

When it comes to a certain point, and we start to feel too comfortable, that's when life will come in and give you a kick in the ass and tell you, no, remember the hard times. I can't decide if it's called the calm before the storm, or the storm after the calm. Basically it's saying the same thing. Calm and storms take turns to come.

I don't really know if it was a mistake actually, but I gotta go with 'it never happened'. Sometimes, when things are spelled out so clearly, even if it's not the answer you want to hear, you gotta respect the decisions that were made. Never trust anyone, some might say. There's only one thing I really trust in this world. Time. Time will always tell you if you are living in an illusion.

How should I put this? It's a bittersweet feeling.